Into the Wilderness
by packbacker
Summary: Laura convinces Jack to take Sydney on a weekend camping trip for some father-daughter bonding time, but she has ulterior motives.
1. Default Chapter

Disclaimer: Alias and all the characters belong to JJ Abrams. But I wouldn't mind borrowing Jack for a little while...  
  
***  
  
"What is this?"   
  
Jack asked as he spied the cream-colored pamphlet that had been placed in a pile of papers on his desk. He had sat down in his home office only moments before, having returned from a three-week mission the previous day, and needed to sort through some papers that night.  
  
"What is what?"   
  
Laura asked innocently from the kitchen, where she was cleaning up the table. She had put Sydney to bed after dinner, and was only now finally getting around to straightening up the kitchen. Laura could tell by Jack's tone that he had spotted the Wilderness Guides/Wilderness Girls pamphlet she had gotten from another mother during Sydney's gymnastics lesson the week before. As she heard Jack start to complain under his breath, she tried to suppress a smile as she put down the dirty dish she had just picked up from the table and headed for Jack's office.  
  
Laura entered the room and noted the stern look on Jack's face as he perused the pamphlet in front of him.   
  
"Laura, what is this about?"  
  
Laura, no longer able to hide her amusement, began the speech that she had been rehearsing for Jack ever since she heard about the Wilderness Guides/Wilderness Girls program.   
  
"Jack, I know how often you're gone from home with your job, and you know how much Sydney loves to spend time with you, so I thought it would be a great idea if you and her spent some time together... without me. You know, some father-daughter bonding time."   
  
Laura waited for Jack's response, realizing that this idea would not appeal to him at first. She knew she'd have to sell the whole Wilderness program to Jack. And unlike her handler, with whom she wheeled and dealed on a regular occasion, Mr. Jack Bristow was no easy customer, and would require some serious incentives to make the sale.  
  
"But Laura, when I come home, I want to spend time with Sydney AND you. Besides, how am I supposed to take care of a little girl all weekend on my own? Are you aware that she could come back from this Wilderness Girls excursion banged-up, bruised, skinned knees, broken bones, black eyes..."  
  
"Oh, I'm not worried about Sydney's safety," Laura quickly replied. "There will be all those other parents there to help look out for her. It's you I'm worried about, Mr. Bristow. I'm scared you won't be able to hold up to all the small talk and down-and-dirty dealings about tent positioning, fire production, marshmallow roasting, and so forth."   
  
Laura looked at Jack with her best façade of mock concern, which Jack immediately saw straight through.   
  
"Laura, this is nothing more than a blatant attempt to get me to bond with a bunch of other parents I hardly know and their whiny kids while you get a weekend all to yourself to do God knows what, without the presence of your needy husband and daughter."   
  
It was Jack's turn to smile. He realized what Laura had come into this battle knowing - it would take a fair amount of negotiating on both sides before this conflict came to an end, and Jack planned to accrue as many concessions as he could before he acceded to the Wilderness Girls weekend for which he surmised he had already been signed up, thanks to his lovely wife.  
  
Now it was Laura's turn to pretend to be miffed.   
  
"Jack, you know as well as I do that the only people we ever socialize with are your work contacts and a few other professors from the English department. I just thought it would be nice for you to get to know some of Sydney's friends' parents, and Sydney would be thrilled. She is forever talking about her friends' Wilderness Girls weekends, and how much fun they have, asking me why can't she go too."  
  
Laura didn't tell Jack the real reason she wanted him and Sydney to join Wilderness Girls. She knew that eventually she would have to leave her family, and she also knew that the more friends Jack and Sydney had to depend on during that difficult time, the easier it would be for them to cope with the situation.   
  
Jack sarcastically responded to Laura's plea.   
  
"Well, since you have this sudden interest in our family's social skills or lack thereof, why don't you take Sydney, Mrs. social butterfly?"  
  
Jack smiled, thinking he'd won this round. But Laura quickly made him realize his folly.  
  
"Because, Mr. social butterfly, the Wilderness Girls program is specifically for fathers and daughters. Although, I'm sure there are some other fathers in the group that wouldn't mind me hanging around all weekend...I wonder, after the girls are asleep, would the other Guides be up for some skinny dipping in the lake with Mrs. Guide? Personally, I'd much rather have that kind of fun with you, but if you will not take responsibility for our daughter, I guess it's up to me to be one of the guys."   
  
Laura smiled wickedly at Jack, while simultaneously using both her hands to pull her hair out of the bun she had put it in that morning, taking out the bobby pins then turning her head over to shake out her mane. As she flipped her head back up and ran her left hand through her hair, while slowly unbuttoning the top buttons on her shirt with her right hand, she eyed Jack again.   
  
Laura knew that her hair was Jack's weakness, it always had been. He insisted she keep it long, and when Sydney was born he had always protested strongly when Laura wanted to get her hair trimmed. Laura had tried to explain how tangled the hair of a rambunctious little girl could get, and how the after-bath detangling sessions always led to battles and tears, but Jack objected. For Jack the long tresses of his wife and daughter were the two most precious possessions of his household.  
  
Jack took a lingering look at Laura's long hair and the actions of her right hand, and swallowed hard. Then, coming out of the hair-induced trance, Jack replied with his own clever retort.   
  
"Well, if you're so interested in me spending time with Sydney's friends' parents, couldn't I just hang out with the other moms at gymnastics or soccer practice? Mrs. Anderson and Mrs. Bridges always seem to find something to, erm, discuss with me at these functions."  
  
Laura scowled at Jack and quickly moved her right hand away from her buttons. She knew the type of discussions Mrs. Anderson and Mrs. Bridges wanted to have with Jack, and the thought made her fume. She despised Mrs. Anderson, and the way she always grabbed Jack's arm while talking to him, squeezing his bicep. And Mrs. Bridges, wearing far too much makeup, laughing loudly at every witty comment Jack made, continually asking Jack if he had a brother with whom she could be set up, forever hinting at her recent divorce and her current "availability."   
  
Laura knew all too well the effect Jack had on the other soccer moms, and she always made sure to arrange her teaching schedule so she could be home to take Sydney and pick her up from her activities, to keep those other cloying mothers away from her husband. Laura had worked too hard to win Jack in the first place, and now that she had him, she did not plan to have any one else threaten her position.  
  
Jack, realizing his last statement might have been over the line, changed tactics. He had not entered the Wilderness Girls argument to anger Laura. Jack knew from experience the mercurial nature of his wife's temper; how she could go from hot to cold in a second, and he wanted her to stay on his good side, at least until they made it to bed that night. At that point, he mused to himself, she could have whatever side she wanted, as long as she remained in an accommodating mood for everything he had planned once they got into bed.  
  
"Laura, you know I'm kidding, I actually couldn't stand to be around Mrs. Anderson or Mrs. Bridges for very long - every time they talk to me, I hear their words, but all I think about is their poor husbands, and how they don't have the luxury that I do - coming home to you."  
  
Jack knew he'd made a wise move as the smile returned to Laura's face. Taking that as a cue, he got up from his desk and walked over to his wife. He gently placed a hand on each of her shoulders, slowly turning her around. Then, as he began massaging her shoulders, he decided now would be a great time to make his concession speech.   
  
"You know I love to spend time with Sydney, and if you want me to take her on a Wilderness Girls weekend, I will. I hate that my job forces me to be away from her for such long periods of time - every time I leave I pray that she won't have changed at all when I return. But there's always something different - a lost tooth, a new gymnastics trick, a her latest round of spelling words - these things that you get to see every day Laura, they're the little things that I miss, and I regret it more than you'll ever know."  
  
As Laura listened to Jack's words, her mind started thinking of the future, when she would not be there to see all these little changes in their daughter, and all the bigger ones that would occur later. Laura realized again how important this weekend - and all the Wilderness Girls weekends to come - would be for Sydney and Jack. It would allow them to connect in a special way, with an activity that was just theirs. Once she left, hopefully they would continue with Wilderness Girls, and continue to make memories of the two of them together. Laura hoped that by asking Jack to do this with Sydney, she was giving them both something that would help them get through her absence from their lives.  
  
"Oh Jack, thank you - Sydney will be thrilled." Jack began to reply, but Laura, not wanting to miss an opportunity to add in a witty retort of her own, proceeded.   
  
"I think you should be the one to tell her at breakfast, so that she and her friends at school can start planning what tortures... I mean, activities you all will be participating in."   
  
Then Laura turned back towards Jack, cocked her right eyebrow as part of a conspiratorial smirk, and put her arms around his neck.   
  
She continued talking, "I know it will be a difficult transition to go from dangerous missions to a camping trip with a bunch of weekend warriors acting like middle-aged boy scouts, but I also know you are a master at handling difficult situations."  
  
Jack grinned down at his wife, meeting her gaze with his own puckish look. He leaned his head down to kiss her, but as his lips met hers, he began to smile once again. Laura, perturbed that Jack had thwarted the kiss, became irate.   
  
"Why did you stop?"  
  
"I was just thinking about that remark you made earlier about the skinny dipping...it's too bad there's not a lake in the neighborhood - that's the kind of Wilderness Girls activity I'd like for us to be participating in right now."  
  
Laura, now unable to suppress her own smile, answered by speaking against Jack's lips.   
  
"Well, we don't have a lake, which is too bad, really, but we do have a nice big bathtub upstairs... and with all that talk of Mrs. Anderson and Mrs. Bridges earlier, I think it would be best if we washed all thoughts of those two trollops away as soon as possible."  
  
Jack kissed Laura tenderly for a moment, then broke apart long enough to end the discussion. As he wrapped his arms around his wife, he whispered in her ear, "that sounds like the best Wilderness Girl activity I've heard yet." Then he broke their embrace and picked up Laura's hand as they left his office and headed for the bathroom and "Lake Prothalamion," as Laura affectionately dubbed the conjugal bathtub that night. 


	2. 2

The next Friday Jack and Sydney left for their weekend of Wilderness Girls bonding. That Saturday morning, having the whole house to herself, Laura decided to sleep in and spend the weekend doing what she loved best - or, at least what she loved best when Jack and Sydney weren't there to occupy her time.   
  
Usually the Bristow family spent the weekends alternating between doing "Sydney activities:" trips to the park, soccer games, hikes, whatever made their daughter happy. When Laura heard about Wilderness Guides/Wilderness Girls, she realized she had found the perfect father/daughter adventure. Sydney took after her mother; she was a tomboy from birth, preferring hiking boots to ballet slippers and climbing a tree to hosting a tea party for her stuffed animals. And when Sydney continued to regale her mother with tales of the Wilderness Girls weekends that her friends at school told her about, Laura decided to sign up Jack and Sydney. Laura knew Sydney would have a great time, but she had serious reservations about Jack. With a bit of luck he would overlook the other fathers' lack of basic outdoors skills, much less survival skills - and if he did feel the need to comment, hopefully it would only be to her after they returned.  
  
Laura had planned to sleep in, basking in the rare luxury, but she found it hard to sleep in the quiet house. But no matter, she had the day planned with all her favorite solitary activities. She had managed to persuade her handler that she could not meet with him that weekend because she was behind in her grading, and did not want any problems to arise at work due to students complaining about not receiving their papers back on time.   
  
Laura got out of bed and made herself breakfast, then graded papers for a few hours (she was, in truth, a little behind with her schoolwork). Next, she took a walk around the neighborhood, came back and fixed her dinner, took a long bath (which made her think of her evening in Lake Prothalamion with Jack), and settled in bed with a book she'd bought months ago but had never gotten around to reading.   
  
As Laura opened the book, she began to mull over her day's activities. She had to admit she'd enjoyed the time to herself - but then she began to feel selfish. But as she sat in bed, Laura rationalized her motives for sending Jack and Sydney off for the weekend. Any mother needs a little time to herself now and then, she concluded, and Sydney was devastated every time Jack left for a mission. At least this time, when Jack went on Operation Wilderness Girls he had an excellent partner to help watch his back.   
  
Laura knew the reason behind her motives, to forge a stronger bond between Jack and Sydney and allow them both to reach out to some new friends, would help them in their future tribulations. Laura's thoughts drifted to her own solitary future for a second, but she quickly pushed those thoughts to the back of her mind. She would have plenty of time to dwell on those days when they became a reality, but that night she wanted to revel in the present. Laura began reading her book, and several hours later, after having already fallen asleep twice with the book in her lap, she decided to call it a night.   
  
Nights when Jack had been gone used to be especially hard for Laura. During the day she had to keep Sydney occupied and not thinking about her daddy, which took quite a bit of energy and creativity. But at night, after Sydney had gone to bed, Laura would begin to think about Jack. When they had been dating and Jack went on missions, Laura worried incessantly, to the point where she would go whole nights and weeks without sleep. Jack would often return injured, but teasingly comment that she looked worse for the wear than he did. At first Laura summed up her lack of sleep to her fears that her own mission would be jeopardized if something happened to Jack, but she quickly realized that her concern was solely for Jack's safety, not the success of her mission.   
  
After Sydney was born, Laura made a pact with God, the Soviet Union, and any other celestial and/or political powers that might be listening in. Laura vowed that if the higher powers, both spiritual and temporal, would protect Jack and Sydney during their time as a family, and after she left, that when the moment came for her to give them up, she would do so without a fight. Early in her marriage Laura had had fantasies about defecting to the US and leaving her double life behind her. But after she witnessed (and several times herself had a hand in) the types of nefarious activities the KGB regularly utilized, she realized that her "death" would be the only way she could ensure Jack and Sydney lived. Laura had resigned herself after Sydney's birth to the fact that eventually she would have to leave the two things she loved most in the world. But if she believed they would be safe without her, Laura's separation from them would be mollified in some small way. 


	3. 3

Late Sunday afternoon Laura heard Jack's car pull in the driveway and headed outside to greet her two adventurers returned from their weekend trek. Sydney ran up to her mother and Laura bent down to give her daughter a big hug and kiss, at which point Laura noticed the scuffed-up knees, the dirty hands and fingernails, the bits of marshmallow still attached to her daughter's lips, nose, and hair from the previous night's Smores.   
  
And then Laura took a closer look at her daughter's hair. Sydney's long mane, so straight and clean when she had left Friday afternoon, now resembled the matted fur of some wild animal. She could see the tell-tale signs of the weekend's events via her daughter's tresses - swimming in the lake (after which no one had bothered to brush out the tangles), patches of white sun block caked around her daughter's hairline (at least someone had remembered to put sun block on her daughter), and of course the bits of marshmallow throughout her hair. Laura grimaced as she pictured how that evening's bath time would require lots of conditioner, and probably result in many tears after an especially painful detangling session.  
  
Yet Sydney seemed oblivious to all of these facts, talking constantly, telling her mother every activity in which the Wilderness Girls had participated, and how she had hit her target in archery, and how canoeing was her new favorite thing, and couldn't they get a canoe, and how the Wilderness Girls songs were the best, and could they please make Smores that night? Laura's grimace quickly turned to a smile as she realized just how much Sydney had enjoyed herself.   
  
Laura then looked over at Jack, who was smiling at her while unloading the tent and other camping equipment from the car. She noticed that he looked pretty rough as well - not as bad as after his last mission - but he could use a bath himself. Poor baby, she mused, looks like another trip to Lake Prothalamion was in their future.  
  
That night, after the bath-hair struggle and many more Wilderness Girls stories and Sydney's version of the official Wilderness Girls song, Laura had succeeded in getting Sydney to sleep only after she finally came down from her Smores-induced sugar high. During this escapade, Laura decided that she must teach Jack how to carefully work through Sydney's long wet hair with a comb during future Wilderness Girl weekends. Otherwise, her daughter would develop a mop closely resembling the knotted locks of a Bergamasco sheepdog she had once seen in the Italian Alps.   
  
Laura went into the bedroom where she found Jack in bed, freshly showered and looking much more like her husband than a rough mountain man.   
  
"It's too bad you already took a shower...I was hoping I could give you as much TLC as I gave Sydney."  
  
"Well I knew detangling those rat's nests might take a while, so I took the liberty of saving you the trouble," Jack replied.   
  
He continued, "after sleeping on the ground for two nights on top of a knotted tree root, this bed feels like a little slice of heaven...and once you join me, it'll be even better."   
  
Jack smiled at Laura as she made her way across the room over to her dresser. After she had taken off her jewelry and brushed her hair, she went and sat on the edge of the bed beside Jack before going into the bathroom.  
  
"Let me go get ready for bed - I need to feel more like me and less like the mean hair-detangling witch I had to become a few hours ago. And then I want you to tell me all about YOUR Wilderness Girls weekend. I've heard the Sydney version, now I'd like to hear your version."  
  
"My version? Oh, but Sydney tells it so much better!"  
  
Laura smiled coyly at Jack. "Okay, then don't tell me your version - just talk to me...I've missed hearing your voice the past two days. You know it's one of my favorite parts about you?"  
  
"Hmmm, okay, you go get ready, and I'll try to think of something good to tell you when you come back," Jack said with his own mischievous smile. 


	4. 4

Later that night, as Laura lay awake with her head on Jack's chest, listening to his heartbeat, she tried hard to memorize everything about that moment, willing it to remain in her memory forever. Jack, sensing the level of sheer concentration exuding from the form hugging his body, awoke from his light sleep and began to stroke Laura's hair that was cascading over her back.   
  
"Laura, can I ask you a question?"  
  
"Yes. Anything."   
  
Laura realized her own intense thoughts had almost willed Jack awake, and she expected him to seek the answer to some deep revelation, which given her present state of mind she almost certainly would divine to him.   
  
Instead, he said, "this whole Wilderness Girls weekend got me thinking - have you ever wondered if you're part Native American? I know your parents passed away and you don't have any relatives you can ask, but you're from the Midwest, and there were a lot of Plains Tribes.... and you know, you have dark brown hair and dark brown eyes, and you get so tan in the summertime. Another Guide told some stories to the girls about the adventures of an Indian princess, and Sydney loved it. I just thought it would be even better for her next time if she went to the Wilderness Girls weekend thinking that she was actually part Native American.... because she had such a great time this weekend, and I want her to continue to like doing these father-daughter events with me. I really enjoyed the time we spent together..."  
  
While Jack was talking, Laura's eyes began brimming with tears of happiness and sadness. She was elated that Jack and Sydney had had such a wonderful weekend together. But she was distressed that her husband would never know her true past, and that she could never share her heritage with Sydney. Laura desperately wanted to tell Jack the stories her own mother had told her as a child. That Laura descended from a great Russian family - not like the tsars - Laura's ancestors did not believe they had any divine rights - but they did work hard and had managed to make a good name for themselves in Russian society. And when the revolution occurred, Laura's family had willingly participated to bring what they believed would be great reforms to their country.   
  
Laura hesitated a second before answering, making sure Jack would not know she was upset.   
  
"I don't think I'm Native American... I think my ancestors came from somewhere in Eastern Europe, although I'm not sure exactly where."   
  
She tilted her head to smile up at Jack, and then continued, "I really am so glad you and Sydney had a great weekend together - I can already tell Wilderness Girls will be all she talks about for weeks to come."   
  
Jack replied, "It was a lot better than I had imagined - the other dads were okay, and we actually had a few laughs... I know that as Sydney's father I'm always supposed to act like a grown-up around her, but sometimes I just want to be her friend... you know, connect with her on her level. And this weekend let me do that."   
  
Jack's mischievous smile returned as he continued to look down at Laura's face. "So I just wanted to say thanks for needing some time to yourself - or whatever reason you kicked us out this weekend - because we both really enjoyed ourselves."  
  
Laura, still looking up at Jack, widened her own smile, and Jack recognized that evil grin reappearing which he knew always meant trouble - the kind of trouble at which he and Laura had become experts.   
  
"Well, next time maybe you could take me away for the weekend, and I could be your Wilderness Girl. I'm sure we could come up with some activities almost as much fun as archery and canoeing..."  
  
Jack bent his own head down and kissed the hair on top of Laura's head. Then he answered her, "the more I hear about all these different activities I can participate in, the more I think I could really start liking these weekend excursions with my two favorite Wilderness Girls."  
  
Jack soon fell back to sleep, and Laura followed him, happy that she had succeeded in her quest to strengthen the bond between Jack and Sydney that she wanted to secure before... but Laura stopped herself from thinking about that, instead drifting off to sleep imagining what activities she and Jack would participate in during their excursion. As she slipped into that gray region between wake and sleep, Laura made a mental note to herself to make sure their own Wilderness weekend included some quality time in a lake. 


End file.
